Almost Pierced My Heart

Kate has been asking for two years now to get her ears pierced. Our only real hesitation has been her ability to take care of all the little sets of earrings.

We decided her 10th birthday was a good time. We didn't have a chance to go on the day of her birthday, so we went on the following Saturday afternoon. Kate continued to express some hesitancy throughout the morning. "Mom, I'm scared." I reassured her the pain would be brief. After the fourth or fifth time I blurted out, "Kate! My peircing wasn't bad!" (Thinking of that crazy weekend in El Paso when I decided to pierce my belly button...I took it out a few months later). "Mom, you said you were three when you got your ears pierced and that you didn't remember." I promptly changed the subject.

Shem was still away at the Fathers and Sons camp so I took Colin, Liam, and Kate (of course) to Claire's. Kate was both excited and worried. I tried to be encouraging.

We walked into the store and over to the piercing counter. A little girl about 4 years old was sitting in the chair and crying hysterically. "No! No! No!" she screamed. This went on for a few minutes until finally her mother held her down and the piercings were quickly finished. The crying stopped soon thereafter.

I had started filling out the paperwork when I looked over to find Kate slowly backing away toward the door. In a panicked voice she confessed, "Mom, I don't want to do this anymore." I took her by the shoulders and looked into her frightened eyes. "Kate, you have been asking to do this for two years. You are going to be just fine."

She chose out her new earrings (white daisies with a pink center) and I guided her to the chair as the woman helping us loaded the first earring into the piercing gun. Kate was clearly unsettled, so the kind lady explained how the whole thing would go down. She cleaned Kate's earlobes and then she marked the spot. Up to this point I had not fully realized what we were about to get into.

With her ears prepped and the gun ready, the woman gently reached for Kate's right ear. Before she could get a hold Kate clamped her ear down onto her right shoulder. Being the determined person that I am I tried to pry her head back into an upright position. With no success we tried to go for the other ear. She immediately shifted the tilt of her head and buried her left ear into her left shoulder. We went back and forth a few times until, nervously giggling, she tried to slide out of the chair all together.

I tried to coax her back into the chair and when she wouldn't go I tired to lift her. She tensed her body straight and tight and I couldn't even get her off the ground. I took her by the shoulders and reminded her that this would not be that bad. I mentioned the earrings her friends had given her for her birthday and how disappointed they would be if she came to school on Monday and her ears weren't pierced. She started to sob. "Please Mom. Don't make me do this."

She wouldn't get back in the chair and she was getting more upset so we recruited every pierced person in the place to assure her that it wasn't going to hurt. Our piercing specialist had at least five piercings in each ear and she was also very encouraging. I told Kate that when it was all over she was going to feel silly for making such a big fuss. When Kate continued to refuse, I turned on the heat. "If we walk out of this store we are NEVER coming back and I am going to take your Webkinz away for a month."

I tried to bribe her with a necklace in the store. "Sit back down and I'll buy you this cute owl necklace." She backed away into the corner of the store and continued to plead, "Mom. PLEASE don't make me do this. I don't want to do this." I must have looked like a crazy, abusive mother to try to hold my child down and then continue to insist she get her ears pierced. The thing is that I didn't really care so much about the piercing, I just knew she was overreacting and I wanted her to follow through on her decision.

I was getting very desperate. "The package of earrings have been opened. We are going to have to pay for them. I don't want to waste my money." I played my final card. I called Dad. "Honey, are you almost home from the camp? Kate is refusing to sit in the piercing chair and I was wondering if you would come and hold her down?" I put Kate on the phone and she got some encouragement from Dad (and so did I).

Just then our tender mercy arrived. Another little girl had come in to get her ears done. She had been waiting through a portion of our fiasco and our gal was starting to get worried about losing her business. Kate insisted that the girl should go first.

The cute little five-year-old jumped up into the chair. When the first earring went through she went, "Ohh." Then the second went through and she was done. Such a far cry from the first girl (who it turns out had her earring ripped out of her ear during a tumbling class). Suddenly we had renewed hope. Kate decided if a girl half her age could do it, she could do it to.

It wasn't all easy sailing from that point, but after a practice piercing on a bear, more hugs, and a little distraction on my smartphone we got the first earring in. Her response? "That wasn't so bad." By the time her second ear was prepped she commented on how she didn't even remember how the first one felt.

I walked out of that store with a perfect understanding of why my mom had my ears pierced when I was three.